Thursday, October 05, 2006

Doubts and Remembrance

Have you ever had doubts -- when you felt you weren't sure whether God cared, or even if he was actually there? You aren't alone, because I know of at least two others with doubts. One wrote a psalm:
Has his unfailing love vanished forever?
Has his promise failed for all time?
Psalm 77.8
Now that's what I call "doubt." I mean, that's pretty severe; it's practically a contradiction in itself.

And who's the other one with doubts? It was me, as if you didn't know. I found great comfort in this particular psalm, and I actually memorized verses 10-12 once:

Then I thought, "To this I will appeal:
the years of the right hand of the Most High."
I will remember the deeds of the Lord;
yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.
I will meditate on all your works
and consider all your mighty deeds.

Psalm 77.10-12

Because this is the thing that gets me out of the valley when I'm in doubt: I remember the things he's done in my life, how he rescued me from the dumb and dangerous things I did when I was in high school. And afterwards too.

And how he's been teaching me throughout my life -- whether I learned well from that is another issue -- and how he's brought blessings into my life, one after the other: a church family - it's not perfect, but it's good; a career - ditto; the right mix of challenges and annoyances and setbacks and encouragements that I can have joy and gratitude in my life, but I also have to lean on him because, like everyone, I have struggles, doubts, difficulties.

And when those come, I have to remember to remember.

May God help us to remember what we need to.

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