How death helped me focus on hope in life

Uncle Harry died on February; he was about 95. On hearing that news, his brother Gilbert, nearly 97, took a nosedive and died two weeks later.

I sat with my father at Gilbert's viewing. "Every day's a gift, isn't it?" It made me think about what I hope for my final years.

Both Harry and Gilbert had had strokes; they were wheelchair-bound and had not been in good health for some years. My aunt, their younger sister, has been losing her memory for some time. If I am fortunate enough to live to 95 or 97, what do I wish for that time?

Most likely my physical condition won't be great. Even if I don't fall 10' onto a concrete floor, as Dad has, I won't be doing 20- or 30-mile bike rides at that age. And a lot of my memory will probably be gone, too; already the kids remember lots of things I have long forgotten.

David Brinkner asks, "If you could choose just one word to describe what you want people to know about you, what would it be?" What indeed? What do you or I want people to know about us—and related to that, what kind of person do you or I want to be? Putting aside the question of what remains when our memories are gone, what kind of person do I want to be?

Other than "forty years younger", what comes to mind is that I hope to finish well. I want my life to be characerized by love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and generosity, gentleness, self-control and courage. Sound like a plan? The question is, what am I doing now about it?

One important thing is to practice some of those things.

I wrote that a year ago, and since then, my brother-in-law Danny also died. He was not much older than I am today, and I wrote about him at the time. Who am I becoming? What am I doing for others? These are much more important questions than "what's my bank balance?" or "what's my raise or bonus this year?"

Here's another good one: "What am I waiting for?" We had a great sermon the other day, where our pastor pointed out that many people in the Bible had excuses, reasons they weren't "ready" for God's call: Jeremiah was too young, Abraham was too old, Moses was a poor public speaker, and so on. God uses people who aren't ready, and who fits that description better than I?